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N O N – V E R B A L C O M M U N I C A T IO N 7 7

Cul tura l Nuance

Understanding non-verbal communication is a true art—mainly because itvaries so significantly from culture to culture. One’s culture determines how closewe stand when talking with another, or how much eye contact we demand.Culture also determines what non-verbal signs we use to express anger or hatredor trust or approval. Don’t underestimate the cultural differences in theinterpretation of non-verbal forms of communication. What is a gesture of joy inone culture may be considered a rude insult in another.

Consider the case of one British businessman in Iran. After months of doingthe right thing—building relationships with Iranian colleagues, respecting theinfluence of Islam on negotiations and avoiding any potentially explosive politicalsmall talk—the executive was elated once a formal contract was signed. He signedthe papers and turned to give his Persian colleagues a big thumbs up. Almostimmediately there was a gasp and one Iranian executive left the room. The Britishexecutive didn’t have a clue as to what was going on—and his Iranian hosts weretoo embarrassed to tell him.

The explanation was really quite simple. While the thumbs-up gesture means“good, great, well-played” in Britain, in the Persian culture it is a sign of discontentand borders on the obscene. “I don’t think I was ever more embarrassed in my life.I felt like a child who yells out a vulgar curse word without having any clue as towhat it means,” the executive says. “My colleagues accepted my plea of ignorancebut the relationship was damaged. It wasn’t that they thought I had truly meant thegesture as interpreted in their culture but rather that I was totally ignorant of it. Ijust never suspected there was anything wrong with it.”

The lesson here is simple. Communicating effectively across cultures requiresmore than understanding the written and spoken language. It involves a basicknowledge of the acceptable non-verbal forms of communication within a cultureas well. In this case experience is probably the best teacher.

Non-Verba l Communica t ion Types

While even in spoken communication there is enormous room for ambiguity,body language is even more inexact and one needs to be careful interpreting it. Agrin, a nod, a wink, a frown does not always have some sort of profoundmeaning—though in certain cultures such facial expressions can be highlyrevealing. The key to understanding the meaning behind facial expressions andbody movements is not in the individual expressions or movements themselves,but rather in the transition from one body movement to another.

Take an individual who when you begin a discussion is, literally, sitting on theedge of their seat. That gesture in and of itself is meaningless because that is howthey are comfortable and like to listen—leaning forward on the edge of their seat.Then, after thirty minutes of talks, that same individual begins leaning forwardeven more. That would indicate an active interest. But say the same person beginsleaning back in their chair after 30 minutes—that would indicate a loss of interest.

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L E A R N T O L O O K

Getting a meaningful read on an individual’s body language takesconcentration and keen powers of observation. But there is no denying the payoff.The most effective method of reading body language is a two-step process. First,observe the individual’s mannerisms during the initial part of a discussion whentension is at its lowest and the subject is apt to be the most friendly. Then, as thetalks continue, you can note any sudden changes in behavior or posture.Remember, the key to understanding body language is not the gesture itself butrather the transition from one posture to another.

But researchers warn against being overly captivated by the myths of bodylanguage. Reading body language is not a foolproof method of judging a person’strue intentions and sincerity. This would mean that one of the main reasons spokenlanguage was invented was to help humans deceive each other and cover up thetruth of non-verbal communication—that is hardly a reasonable assumption.

Basic Body L inguis t ics

D R E S S A N D A P P E A R A N C E

There is one form of non-verbal communication that you can maintain a greatdeal of control over—your physical appearance. As mentioned earlier in this book,clothes may not make the man—or the woman—but the reality is that how youlook goes a long way in making that first impression. A rumpled look, an unshavenface, perhaps too short a skirt or too high a heel, can leave someone with a negativeimpression or at least signal that you are unprepared and not a businessperson tobe taken seriously.

The purpose of clothing has changed much since humans first donned animalskins for cover. Today, clothes are considered an expression of the individual anda way to identify a person as a member of a certain class or profession (abusinessman in a suit, a doctor in a lab coat). Dressing to fit the part is essential.It may not be fair but it is a reality.

E Y E C O N T A C T

The eyes are said to be the window to the soul—and they can reveal the deepermeaning behind the spoken word. But the amount of proper eye contact variesgreatly from culture to culture. For example, Americans take direct eye contactas a sign of honesty and sincerity. It shows interest and attentiveness while a lackof eye contact or shifty eyes is taken as a sign of untruthfulness.

Now compare this to the French attitude. Eye contact is considered a statementof equality and is too personal a gesture to use with strangers in a social setting.However, in business meetings, the French will demand at least some direct eyecontact. To refuse to meet someone’s eyes is an unfriendly gesture. Finally,compare this to the attitude in Japan where they believe that the less eye contact,the higher the level of esteem. To divert one’s eyes from a business colleague is asign of respect and reverence.

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N O N – V E R B A L C O M M U N I C A T IO N 7 9

F A C I A L E X P R E S S I O N S

Researchers estimate that the human face is capable of creating in excess of aquarter of a million different expressions. Emotions such as happiness and sadnessare not easily hidden by facial expressions in most cultures. The ability to producethe proper expression at the proper time can be a powerful way to re-enforce thespoken word. But even the most basic of facial expressions, the smile, can meandifferent things in different cultures.

For example, Americans consider the smile a highly positive sign—a signal ofa warming relationship. However, while Americans are quick to smile, the Frenchare wary of smiles and laughter, especially among strangers. The French smileonly when there is an explicit reason. A French human resources magazine wentso far as to list 13 different types of smiles and their meaning, from weak andcowardly to mocking. Americans may throw smiles around quite nonchalantlybut to the French smiling can be serious business. Compare these two attitudesto Japan where the smile has little place in business negotiations. Usually the onlysmiles you do see are at the successful conclusion of a contact. A Japaneseexecutive is likely to interpret a smile before then as a sign of lack of seriousness—or even as a gesture of mockery.

P E R S O N A L S P A C E

In some cultures individuals regard space as personal territory and detest theinvasion of their turf. The formal term for the amount of space around us orbetween us and others is proxemics. This, too, can be a form of non-verbalcommunication. How closely people position themselves to one another during adiscussion can communicate what type of relationship exists between them. Forexample, researchers have determined the proxemics found in American culture:

0-18 inches is intimate space reserved for family and close friends18 inches to 4 feet is personal space used in most interpersonal interactions4-12 feet is social-consultative space used in more formal interactions

Of course, Asian and Arabic cultures are minimalist when it comes toproxemics. In these cultures, there is little regard for personal space, and judgingthe warmth or type of relationship by the amount of space allocated to you byindividuals would lead to false conclusions. For businesspeople used to a wideswath of personal space, it is important to hold your ground and not back awaywhen encountering an individual from a culture where space is less important. Toback away in these circumstances would be offensive and rude and can lead to acomical “chase” as one person backs away while the other steps forward to closethe distance.

P O S T U R E Straight, erect posture, shoulders back, head held high are generally considered

the attributes of an individual who is confident, energetic and self-assured. Butposture can also be an indication of the existence of communication barriers.Generally, a relaxed posture, a comfortable seating position, uncrossed arms, andlack of stiffness indicate openness with no communication obstacles. On the otherhand, abrupt movements, shifting seating positions, crossed arms or legs may signaldefiance, disinterest or an unwillingness to listen. Generally in most cultures:

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■ Slumped posture means low spirits or can signal defeat or disinterest. (In Confucian cultures it denotes a lack of internal harmony.)

■ Leaning forward shows openness and interest.

■ Leaning backwards or away from the speaker indicates a defensive posture or disinterest.

■ Crossed arms or crossed legs signals a defensive position.

■ Uncrossed arms shows a willingness to listen.

S I L E N C E

The act of remaining silent is far from a passive action. However, in differentcultures it can mean very different things—or, in the case of Asian cultures, it maymean nothing at all. American, German, French and Arabic executives take asilent reaction to be a negative one. Likewise, when businesspeople from thesecultures show no reaction to a proposal or presentation, it should be taken as anegative. However, in Asian cultures silence is not equated with failure or anegative attitude. Rather it simply means that executives are taking time to digestthe information and put it into context. The same is true in Scandinavian countrieswhere more thought is given to a reaction following a presentation or discussionthan in other European cultures. While such silences may seem awkward to some,it would be wrong to expect an immediate reaction of any depth or meaning incultures where silence is not thought of as a negative.

G E S T U R E S

Hand and body gestures are often used to emphasize a point and add meaningto the spoken word. When used properly they can be a powerful force in capturingthe attention of an audience. But the reverse is also true. You can undermine yourmessage by subconsciously using gestures that send negative signals. As a listener,watching out for the hand movements or body gestures employed by a speakercan give an interesting insight into the true attitude behind the words. Again, themeaning of some gestures varies greatly according to culture. For example, theOK sign, with thumb and index finger forming an “O” and the remaining threefingers slightly raised, means everything is fine and going well to an American.However, to the French the gesture means exactly the opposite—that a proposalis absolutely worthless, a zero. To the Japanese, it has no positive or negativeconnotation at all but rather is a commonly used symbol for money. The reason:the “O” formed by the thumb and index finger suggests the shape of a coin.

P O S I T I V E V E R S U S N E G A T I V E B O D Y L A N G U A G E

Across all cultures, there are some basic gestures and movements that do havea common meaning. Figuring them out is not brain surgery. Some examples ofpositive body language and gestures:

■ T H E N O D A fairly rapid almost subconscious nodding of the head signalsagreement with what the speaker is saying. It can be a useful signal given by alistener to encourage a speaker and build enthusiasm. Of course, a slower seriesof head bobs may mean your audience is literally nodding off to sleep.

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■ M O V I N G C L O S E R , L E A N I N G F O R W A R D This is an almost uncontrollableaction on the behalf of listeners when they are really interested in a subject. It alsomeans that you have overcome fundamental resistance and barriers tocommunication that existed have been overcome. If you bring people to the edgeof their seats, you have them hooked.

■ P L E N T Y O F H A N D M O V E M E N T , P A L M S O P E N The more the hands move,the more open and involved a speaker is with the audience.

■ N O T E T A K I N G This generally shows a heightened amount of interest and aseriousness about listening. This is more true in North America than in othercultures, though. (Americans almost always attend meetings and presentationsarmed with notepad and pen.) However, in some cultures (Germany is oneexample), taking notes is the job of a secretary and not an executive. To take noteswould demean your status.

Researchers agree that negative body language is much less reliable as anindicator of mood or interest than positive body language. The listener may simplybe sitting in an uncomfortable chair, suffering from an extreme of temperature(too hot in the room or too cold) or may be nursing a hangover from the previousnight’s social fling. Regardless, some basic gestures and movements that may havenegative connotations include:

■ W I T H D R A W A L , L E A N I N G A W A Y F R O M T H E S P E A K E R As would beexpected this means the opposite of leaning closer to a speaker. It is perhaps oneof the strongest and uncontrollable negative signals a listener can send.

■ F O L D E D A R M S An act of defiance indicating that you need to overcomeobstacles or skepticism before hoping to reach the listener.

■ H A N D S O N F A C E This is a signal that an audience may be listening to what youhave to say but may not wholly agree with it. Holding one’s chin while restingthe elbow on the table usually means the listener is bored. (In Asia, it can alsoindicate unhappiness.)

■ S H I F T I N G P O S I T I O N S Again, if not due to a listener’s physical discomfort, itindicates boredom, disagreement and perhaps impatience with the content orlength of the presentation.

■ T H E Y A W N Self-explanatory. You have lost your audience. Cut out the detailand put more energy into the discussion.

■ W A N D E R I N G E Y E S Eyes darting around the room, open stares, flipping throughprinted handouts, checking a wristwatch are all indicators of a lack of interest andattention. If you see this toward the end of a presentation, wrap it up in a hurry.

Reading React ions in Di f ferent Cul tures

Successfully reading body language and the meaning of gestures in differentcultures is truly a subtle art form. The following examples taken from four distinctcultures from four continents show just how diverse a meaning body languagecan have.

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R E A D I N G T H E A M E R I C A N S

Directness is a highly valued trait in the United States. Because they are a veryanimated people and not averse to letting others know how they feel, Americanscan be relatively easy to read. And often they expect you to pick up on their non-verbal signals. When they are restless or bored, they fidget. When they areimpatient they drum their fingers on the table. When they are ready to leave theylook at their watches. Even when they attempt being discreet, it is difficult forthem to hide their true feelings. Their body language is usually a giveaway.

For Americans the handshake is a vital test of their opponent—the firmer thebetter. Direct eye contact is taken as a sign of honesty and sincerity. To avoid itis to run the risk of being thought of as lying, distorting the truth or coveringsomething up. Raised voices and animated gestures do not necessarily indicateanger. They may reflect enthusiasm and excitement. Americans will tell you whenthey are angry. Uncertainty or reluctance to agree are often indicated by shruggingthe shoulders or looking away. Pointing at someone to clarify meaning is normalbut emphatic or repeated pointing usually indicates agitation or aggression.

Americans will sometimes emphasize a strongly held commitment, belief orposition by banging on the table or suddenly standing up. Raising the eyebrows or asudden pulling back of the head indicates surprise, disbelief or astonishment.Basically, with America executives, what you see is what you get. Deliberate deceptionis really not their style—and they probably couldn’t hide it if they wanted to.

R E A D I N G T H E R U S S I A N S

As in America, handshaking is serious business in Russia. The general rule ofthumb is that should a Russian become demonstratively physical—bear hugs,death-grip handshakes, exuberant backslapping—your meeting went very welland the personal relationship that lies as the basis for business deals is well on theway to succeeding. On the other hand, a stone face and lack of warm contact isa clear indicator that something is amiss.

Russians do use body language and hand gestures rather than verbalcommunication to signify their excitement, approval or disapproval of anindividual, an idea or even a business proposal. (A case in point is the late NikitaKhrushchev’s shoe-banging episode at the United Nations in the 1960s. Russiansdo believe that physical gestures lend drama to simple communications and helpto underscore the intensity of feeling.) While many Russian businesspeople willsit poker-faced during a presentation, they will provide subtle clues as to theirfeelings by using facial expressions and gestures. Winks and nods are good thingsif coming from your Russian counterparts.

While American businesspeople are apt to be all smiles from the start, Russiansmay be just the opposite. (It has been suggested that the chronically poor state ofthe country’s dental health is the real reason behind the severe rationing of Russiansmiles.) Here, the smile is highly valued and used only when needed. Should youlook across the room and see your Russian counterparts with happy smiley faces,that is a very good sign. However, beware the grim face—it means you are notgetting through. Try and maintain direct eye contact with your Russian counterpart,even if you are using an interpreter to discuss business. Looking away during aconversation is not only considered rude but it casts doubt on your sincerity. If aRussian avoids eye contact, then you are probably getting less than half the truth.

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R E A D I N G T H E S O U T H A F R I C A N S

Because South Africans are generally so bubbly and talkative, silence says alot. They are polite as well and if you are boring them, they, unlike the Americansthey admire, will suffer through in silence. When the questions stop, consider ittime to go—you’ve lost your audience. South Africans often use hand gestures inconversation but it is impolite and seen as a personal challenge to point at someonewith your index finger wagging. The amount of hand movements a South Africangenerates while talking is a good indicator of the degree of passion that individualhas for a particular topic or proposal. It is also considered rude to talk with yourhands in your pockets.

South Africans use facial expressions to signal their interest or reactions to aspeaker. It is a highly developed form of communication and a good indicator ofwhether or not you are hitting the mark. At a meeting South Africans will stealglances at one another or at the boss to judge a reaction. Because so much businessis done on trust, eye contact is essential, especially in the white community. BlackAfrican businessmen seem less hung up on that and are more into physical contact.A warm handshake followed by an arm around the shoulder means you had asuccessful meeting.

“It is much easier to tell how things went after meeting with a black SouthAfrican businessman. They are always polite, more so than the whites, but theyalso like to be more demonstrative physically in their approval,” says one Britishbusinessman who has been in South Africa for over a decade. “After oneparticularly good meeting, my black South African counterpart walked me out tomy car in the parking lot and for ten minutes never once took his arm off myshoulder. I knew then we had a deal.”

South Africans like to be right and seem to appreciate positive re-enforcement.If you are listening to a South African, nod agreement. It is a highly positive gestureand if you do it in the appropriate places it will make the speaker much more atease. It is also smart to express agreement verbally on occasion to reinforce thenods.

R E A D I N G T H E J A P A N E S E

The Japanese avoid strangers, shun physical contact, rarely smile, avoid eyecontact and subject themselves to rather strict rules of public behavior, includinga severe limit on emotional expression. The Japanese are taught virtually frombirth to mask their feelings behind blank impassive faces. Even such non-verbalcommunication forms as dress and appearance are masked behind conservativeclothes and a lack of individual style.

Of all global cultures, the Japanese are masters at non-disclosure and atmasking emotions. They are indeed hard people to read. Learning to put a maskover one’s true feelings and emotions is part of growing up in the Japanese culturewhere the expression of emotions, even through involuntary facial expressionsand gestures, is improper behavior. (Remember, this is a culture that values groupharmony and conformity and shuns individualism.) The Japanese have, in effect,the uncanny ability to alter whatever they feel “for public consumption.”

Before they can be displayed in public, true feelings must be refined throughthe innumerable rules of social behavior and social roles that lie at the heart ofJapanese society. Behavior that is permissible for public display is known as

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tatemae. Behaving in a tatemae manner supports the Japanese ideal of socialharmony. Often, visitors remark about the emotionally blank faces of the Japaneseor the feeling that what emotion is expressed appears insincere. This is because,under the rules of tatemae, the Japanese conjure up whatever facial expressionthe situation calls for and the visitor expects. Smiles, for example, are rationedand displayed at the expected time—at the end of a successful deal. To smilebeforehand would violate the rules of tatemae. Also, a smile is sometimes a maskto hide displeasure.

The passive, expressionless face that masks the Japanese executive can beunnerving to visiting business executives, who mistake the passiveness for anegative or disinterested reaction. In fact, the expressionless face may beconcealing nothing more sinister than a daydreaming executive thinking aboutthe party after work. However, because the Japanese display such little emotionthrough gesture and expression, they are especially sensitive to any body languageyou might display—and in fact may exaggerate the meaning.

Gestures Around the Wor ld

As explained earlier, one person’s positive gesture may be another person’sinsult. The world is full of non-verbal gestures that can mean the exact oppositein different cultures. Some examples of the type of gestures an internationalbusiness traveler is likely to come across:

T H E O K S I G N

The “OK” sign, when the thumb and index finger form a circle, means“everything is great,” in the United States and Germany. In Mexico it means thingsare just good, not excellent. In most other European countries as well as in Argentinait means something is worthless—an absolute zero. In Japan it is a symbol formoney, usually coinage. In Spain, Russia, Paraguay, Brazil and Uruguay it isconsidered a vulgar gesture. In Tunisia it conveys a threat of bodily harm.

Everything is Great• United States, Germany

Things are Good (Not Excellent)• Mexico

Worthless (Zero)• France, Most of Europe

Symbol for Money (coins)• Japan

Vulgar Gesture• Spain, Russia• Paraguay, Brazil, Uruguay

Threat of Bodily Harm• Tunisia

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T H U M B S U P

It signals approval in the United States, Britain and Russia. However, in Iranit basically means “screw you.” It is also considered a rude gesture in Australia.

T H U M B S D O W N

In the United States and Canada it shows disapproval. In Greece it is considereda rude sign and is often used by motorists to signal their anger over someone’scrazy driving.

Approval• United States • Great Britain• Russia

Highly Offensive• Iran

Rude• Australia

Disapproval• United States• Canada

Rude• Greece

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